So, I have been interviewing at a bunch of places so far, but no offer yet. As I am faced with a rejection after rejection, it’s hard to not to be discouraged. So far in my career, I’ve never had this much problem finding a job, and it’s both shocking and depressing.

I can attribute this situation to one thing: Stuck in the middle. I am still in the career transition from engineering field to product marketing, and companies assess that two-years of experience in marketing is TOO LITTLE and two-years away from hands-on technical work is TOO LONG. Those companies I have applied for product marketing position selected a candidate with a lot more marketing experiences. Those companies I have applied for technical positions thought I wasn’t technical enough. It would seem difficult to find a marketing position unless I have someone who can sponsor/champion me in a company.

Obviously, this is the lowest point of my life. And in times like this, you come to know who is really your friend and who is not. Well, mostly. I think some actually pretend or give you a lip service, but don’t really care. I’ve spent two years in Korea to transition my career, and if I don’t continue down this marketing path, those two years would seem like a total waste. I have been given a lot of advice from good people. They tell me I will definitely find something I want soon and something good is waiting for me just around the corner. I should stay positive and confident. It’s just matter of timing. All those interviews that didn’t work weren’t meant for me. They are all good and I am grateful for them, but….

But, I can’t help but feeling that walls are closing in. I see kids grow up and they need certain things like new clothes, camps, school, etc. Savings depleting too quickly…. Also, I hate being not settled down. Without a job, it feels like everything is up in the air. Tension is there, and so are silent worries. Everyone is on the edge, and it doesn’t help current situation much.

I don’t really want to stay in the East Coast, but I may need to stay here. But, if I didn’t want to stay in the East Coast but get an offer here, it can’t be why all other interviews didn’t work out…. I used to believe that I am in control of my own destiny and I didn’t believe in fate…., but I don’t know. I am so sure now. Maybe I have a little control over my destiny, and for some reason it’s been all mapped out for me…..